Impact of Discipleship: Jadyn Green
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“I didn’t understand but was willing to learn.”
I was a shy, quaint, timid, artsy, curly-haired eighteen-year-old when I started attending Midtown. These were my late high school days that consisted of quietly listening to music on my phone and hanging out in the art room while Brandon Briscoe spoke passionately about men with ponytails, Michael Jordan, and Jesus Christ.
At the beginning of my junior year, I was invited to C&YA by a dear friend. Initially, I was going because I just wanted friends, not knowing that soon I would find that and much more. After long talks about salvation and quiet mornings in God's word, I accepted Christ into my life. I knew my life would look different from there on out. Excitement was an understatement about how I felt. I was extremely thrilled to be in such a loving church, have brothers and sisters in Christ, and see the love of the Lord. I knew it was enough for me to be content with exactly where God had me until doubt of my ability crept in. There were many moments in between my salvation and starting discipleship where I would get frustrated in God's word because I didn’t know what words such as conviction, faith, worship, trusting the Lord, and sin meant. These phrases were so commonly used around me, and I assumed something must be wrong with me because I had no idea what they meant. I often condemned myself for not knowing.
God used discipleship to teach and establish me in the solid foundation of his word. Everything in discipleship for the most part was completely new to me. Oftentimes, I didn’t understand but was willing to learn. JJ Harper thoughtfully walked me through each lesson, fully investing in me from the start. Her heart was to answer all of my questions in truth and love. I will be forever grateful for the sweetness of her character.
As we made our way through the lessons, I noticed a pattern in my thought life that was beginning to develop. This looked like telling myself that I should understand a phrase used, but since I didn’t, I wouldn’t ever understand. This pattern was controlling to the point of doubtfulness. Then we started lesson ten, which is about dealing with sin. I was confronted with the truth that my identity does not lie in sin but in Christ. God judged my sin at Calvary by placing my sin upon Jesus Christ. For me, this was a point of realization that I persistently condemned myself for what Christ had taken care of at the cross. I was condemning myself for the exact reason God sent his only son for us to be forgiven and no longer be condemned.
After that lesson, I learned that we have liberty in Christ. I began to understand that I am free in Christ. Jesus Christ made us free from sin: “If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed” (John 8:36). Both of these lessons helped me to identify that I am free from condemning myself for who I used to be in comparison to who I want to be. Knowing that God has a will over my life and his will for me is to have a relationship with him showed me that there is no need for me to have everything figured out all at once. I simply get to be obedient in following Christ with my whole heart.
“I don’t have to beat myself up for not knowing, but rather approach the unknown with faith.”
Discipleship showed me that all things always come back to God, no matter what. It seems simple now, but back then the truth that I could trust the Lord to grow me in understanding his word seemed unreachable. God desires for me to trust in him, lift up requests to him, and set my love on him. God loves me. That in and of itself is encouraging me to pick myself back up and move forward in faith. It is a blessing to learn from God's word each day and I don’t have to beat myself up for not knowing, but rather approach the unknown with faith.
Romans 10:17 “So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.”
I am so thankful for where the Lord has me and where I am encouraged to keep going. Discipleship taught me so much and now my eyes get to be set on others: teaching them what the Lord has taught me through his word.
Jadyn Green is a member at Midtown Baptist Temple and is a part of C&YA. She serves on the C&YA Hospitality Team and is a part of one of the Oak Street Women’s Bible Studies.